And the Cure for Social Anxiety is . . .

By Astrid Mendieta

I don’t actually know what the cure is. It changes from person to person. But one thing is certain: people suffer from social anxiety. You want to know how I know that? Because I sure do!

That’s right. The super spunky, super talkative, super goofy girl who is usually running late because she gets lost in conversation with someone suffers from social anxiety.

“But, Astrid, you’re one of the most outgoing people I know! You’re literally a Disney princess!”

Aw, shucks! You flatter me. But alas, it’s true. But I promise you that travel helps!

Every time I’m out in public, my mind lets out the little doubts that whisper about how everyone is looking at me and laughing at me. I hear things like, “They don’t like you; they think you’re weird; they don’t want to talk to you.” Whenever I get a compliment, I think, “They don’t mean it; they’re just being nice; they’re probably laughing at me for believing them.”

Yikes. It’s a real problem on how I see myself. It’s not a problem because I want others to like me (although I like it when people like me). It’s a problem because I don’t see myself the way God sees me, and it’s holding me back from my full potential.

So how do I become the vivacious person I am? What makes me such a bubbly person? Part of the answer (and my focus for this blog post) comes from my childhood. It came from Disney World!

As a kid, I loved Disney (I still do). I would watch Beauty and the Beast and relate to Belle wanting adventure in the great wide somewhere. I related to Quasimodo wanting to live one day out there, or Milo wanting to explore Atlantis. I loved that these characters were outcasts, but they still got their adventure. When my family moved from southern California to southern Florida, I saw my chance for adventure.

Unfortunately, that adventure wasn’t a walk in the park; it was a panicked run in the woods with wolves chasing after me.

I got bullied in school, and I got teased because I was “getting too old for Disney.” But I refused to listen. I let Disney develop my love for art, music, and storytelling. And every summer, I went to Disney World.

I was a bashful kid, but I suddenly became the most fearless little girl at Disney. I would remember telling my classmates about my adventures on Splash Mountain or my trip to the mines on Thunder Mountain at the start of the school year.

Of course, life got rougher as I grew older. I withdrew into my shell, afraid to leave my anxious thoughts. You never would’ve spotted me in a crowd during that time because I kept to myself and just followed the others.

But whenever we went to Disney World, my parents put me in charge of the itinerary. I knew where everything was, and I talked to the cast members with no fear of judgment. I was in my element.

Fast forward to college, and I’m back in my shell. No one knew who I was, and no one knew the passion and exuberance I gained from my two and a half years in 4-H. What did I do? I went back in my shell.

But then I met some great friends who had done some traveling to Disney parks and beyond. I found that we had common interests, especially with Disney World. So what did I do with them? I went to Disney World!

Now, I’ve had a few experiences where I let social anxiety hold me back, and I’ve had a few experiences where I ignored social anxiety while at my second home (Disney World, in case you’re wondering).

My most memorable moments overcoming social anxiety usually involve my group getting split up, ending up with me sitting by a stranger.

I was on a ferry sitting next to a man who had to sit across from his wife. I was tired and anxious sitting next to a stranger, but I thought the feeling could go away with some light conversation.

“He doesn’t want to talk to you,” I heard my doubts whisper.

“Then give him a conversation he’ll want to continue,” my budding confidence replied.

Not long after, we talked about all the places we’d been to in Florida and our favorite spots there. I talked about my hometown, Naples, and he mentioned how much he loved visiting and how lucky I was to live in paradise. But then we agreed that Disney World was paradise to us!

*This was from my most recent trip to Disney World!*

My second experience overcoming social anxiety was at a time when probably no one wants to talk: the monorail ride back to the Magic Kingdom parking lot.

My group had barely made it onto the last monorail ride. (If we hadn’t made it, we would’ve had to take a cab back!) Everyone in our monorail car was exhausted. We got split up so we could all fit in, and I ended up sitting between a mother and her young son.

I remember being terrified of strangers as a kid, so I decided to talk to the mother instead of the boy. (I didn’t want to scare the poor kid with my enthusiasm!)

“She’s too tired to talk to you,” I heard.

“Well, you just separated her from her son, so you should try to make it less awkward,” I then thought.

I learned that this was her family’s first trip to Disney World despite living in Orlando for a little while. They only went to the Magic Kingdom, so I gave her some tips for visiting the other parks.

Because she was originally from New York, she gave me some New Yorker tips for when I go to a wedding up there in September.

When we all arrived at the parking lot, I gave her one final goodbye, and she thanked me for convincing her that a second trip to Disney World could actually be fun for the whole family.

*Left to right: Ali, me, Kollin, Bella, and Lydia. This was a surprise early birthday gift for Bella (and a not-surprise birthday celebration for Kollin, too).*

In every situation, I had fear about talking to them (because strangers terrify me). But in every situation, I felt the comfort of familiarity and a common interest.

I’m not saying going to Disney World will cure social anxiety, but I know that it helps me. That’s an expensive cure, but that’s not the only thing that helps! Travel in general is an adventure for me, and if there’s anything I’m a sucker for, it’s adventure.

For me, Disney is the adventure that helps me connect with people–something that terrifies me–because I know that I already have something in common with the people I’m around when I’m there: we wanted to go to Disney World.

If you’re having a hard time with social anxiety, just spot me in a crowd talking to someone and remember that we’re all suffering together. Boom. We have a common ground already.

Now let’s go on an adventure.